Transitional writing

I've decided it's time for me to let go of being a journalist and just think of myself as a writer.

I realized when I was still working at the newspaper that many of the standards I tried to adhere to as a journalist were no longer valued, at least not to a point of being a priority among competing interests for limited resources of time, money and space. I had a hard time accepting this reality, which added to my difficulty in keeping up with other changes in the newsroom culture.

Interestingly, after I was laid off, I found myself trying to maintain those standards when I pitched freelance work, even when I was aware the company (or at least the department) I was offering to write for probably didn't care. As a result, I made work much more stressful than it needed to be.

Much of the stress came from the inner conflict regarding three key areas: integrity, transparency and value.

As I prepare to submit another story or two for possible publication, I've decided to try a different approach. I don't think I have to be a journalist anymore. I can be a writer.

For me, the biggest difference is that I can be honest that I'm writing about things I have personal interest in. I likely will be writing about things involving my husband's work, whether it has to do with events his company puts on or places we travel in connection with those events. I may write about events and places for which I'm given free admission. I may write about my church or my friends. I'll be upfront about those connections when I pitch my stories, leaving it up to the publication whether this is a deal-breaker. And I'll be honest in what I write. I won't say I like something if I don't. But I will tend to emphasize the positive parts of any experience.


Another difference is that it will free me from some of the survivor's guilt about writing for far below market value for a journalist. Sometimes I'd rather be paid a little than nothing. And sometimes, I'm more interested in seeing a story published than in getting paid for it. If I hold out for a fair price, my work won't get published for a local audience. I know that makes things harder for journalists, especially freelancers, who are still out there trying to make a living in this field. It's possible it will also backfire on me sometime if I need to re-enter the workforce.

For now, this seems the most honest and realistic path for me.

I look forward to seeing where it leads.

What's up

I'm not sure what's up with me and the blog. I keep having ideas to write about, but when I sit down to do it, they vanish!

I had three ideas earlier today and was looking forward to writing tonight. But about an hour ago, I realized, once again, the ideas had vanished!

I'm posting this, in hopes it might help clear some of the mental fog! (UPDATE: It did!)

Not feeling it

Even when things are going well and I'm surrounded by blessings, sometimes it seems as if something is missing. Today was one of those days.
It's Mother's Day. I sent mom a beautiful greeting card with a gift card inside. I called her. And I likely will visit on Tuesday. She knows I love her everyday, and I know she loves me.

I just feel a little sad that I didn't express it better. 

Even though I'm not a mother, many years I manage to be involved in celebrations of mothers. There was some of that at church today. Mostly it just seemed like another Sunday.

I hope it seemed like more than that for all the mothers.

Again? Yes.

So, I missed my self-imposed deadline again. The deadline was Sunday; it's Friday already, and I'm just now writing. And this isn't even what I have in mind to post. I have two ideas I hope to flesh out before the next deadline passes me by. I'm strangely optimistic I'll get it done. And posting this in the interim could help that happen.