Grateful for God's Faithfulness

As much as I try to live one day at a time, I can't resist trying to end the month with a blog post.

An expression of gratitude. Of hope. Of acceptance. Of love. Of appreciation.

Gratitude for hope. For life. For light. For love. For beauty. For compassion. For creativity. 

Strength for today, bright hope for tomorrow. 

Yes, it all comes back to God. 

Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto all!

A singer's gotta sing! (And does it count if it's not shared?)

The past week was a bit challenging, as I've been practicing waiting. People whose counsel I value have suggested this practice. 

It's been interesting to want to express my opinion, feelings or thoughts and decide instead to keep it to myself. 

 I experienced some positive results. I also reached a point of feeling very unsettled and somewhat disconnected. 

 I found myself not wanting to attend church, although I know it doesn't seem like worship for me if I'm not with others.

This weekend, it came up in my response to one of my daily Bible reading devotionals:

I don’t need to know what is going on at [church] in order to serve God. (But Lord! You know I don’t want to go alone. And now I must acknowledge — and do I say it to Gene? — that I wish Gene would partner with me on church things. [And God answered an unspoken prayer today, as I was freshly aware of the much-needed and patient support my husband does provide in my church service.])

Father, help me to be a light in this world of darkness, ready for each opportunity to share Your love with those whose spiritual needs are great. You (not Gene or food or family or church leaders) are my Lord and Savior. May I honor You with my love and humble, gracious, willing & cheerful service. 

“Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭55:22‬ ‭NRSV‬‬

 

Before attending the service that doesn't include singing (which is something I miss greatly), I made the decision I would do my part to participate more fully in worship. I sang along with the hymns that are offered online 45 minutes before church. I also sang along with another online service I watched in the afternoon. And I praised God for the beautiful piano music presented at both services. 

Somewhere along the way, I also decided I would try to take advantage of being "dressed for church" as a prompt to record a worship song. I did that today. It was good for my soul. 

 

And it seemed like I also needed to share it on Facebook. So I did. I'm still trying to decide why it seems important to share it. I've been told it's a gift and that it would be selfish not to share. 

For today, it felt right. Many things felt right today. I am grateful. 

Images of a welcome transition

At 1 a.m. Jan. 6, I acknowledged my sadness that my oldest sister didn't realize how much I would treasure having a 2021 calendar that includes a reproduction of an original painting she commissioned based on a tree and porch steps at the Cooke County, Texas, farm that has been in our family for more than 100 years.

Not too long before midnight, I had realized I no longer followed on Facebook artist L.G. Lemons, who did the painting. So I had missed the information about ordering the "Texas Strong" calendar, which is produced in limited-edition, and any extras sell out quickly each year.

I've been trying to live with acceptance of the things I cannot change. But sometimes my FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is strong, fueling resistance to acceptance.

Fortunately, as part of my transition from 2020 to 2021, I have endeavored to transition FOMO from Fear Of Missing Out to Faith Overcoming My Obsessions.

At 1 a.m. Jan. 6, I acknowledged it's hard. I asked God to help me. And I thanked Him in advance.

 

Somewhere along the way, I commented on the artist's Facebook page how sad I was that I had dropped off his "followers" list and missed out on ordering a calendar. 

 

On Friday, Jan. 8, I decided to call my sister to see if perhaps she had ordered an extra copy of the calendar since it included her commissioned artwork. When I called, she said she didn't order any extras, and she figured I would have ordered one. She said since she had the original painting, I could have her calendar after the year was over, if I just wanted it for sentimental reasons. I figured that was the best I could do.

 

Then I glanced at my computer screen and saw that the artist had sent me a message, saying he was aware that 3 calendars were available at the museum in Nocona, the Texas town where he has his studio. However, he also knew that someone was on her way to buy at least two. He gave me the phone number for the museum, which I called immediately. The person who answered the phone confirmed they had one calendar left. I quickly purchased it, along with the cost of shipping, by credit card. 

 

It's a little thing in many ways, but it sure made me smile to get what I thought I missed out on.

 

It arrived in the mail today (Jan. 14), and I'm still pleased. 

I'm also still processing why it's important to me, and how it fits in with the transition from Fear Of Missing Out to Faith Overcoming My Obsessions. 

The way it turned out seemed like a gift from God, perhaps an affirmation of  my small steps of faith.

I'm grateful and open to see what lessons and surprises God has in store next.

So, When IS the 12th Day of Christmas?

Confession: The tree did not come down on Jan. 5. 

Even when I planned to put it away today, I was unsure how the 12 days of Christmas are counted. If you start with Christmas Day, the 12th day would have been today, Jan. 5. 

But isn't Epiphany supposed to coincide with the 12th day? And isn't Epiphany Jan. 6? 

Of course, does it really matter? And isn't this just me overthinking something simple again?

The bottom line is that the decorated and lighted Christmas tree is still bringing me joy.

Taking it down was not a priority today. I'm grateful I can enjoy its beauty and light until the time is right! I'm confident I'll know when that time arrives.

(Update: The tree came down Friday, Jan. 8. I finished mailing cards and delivering gifts Jan. 11. Now I just need to make sure I’ve thanked everyone. It was a good Christmas season, and I am grateful.)

Ode to a Christmas tree

I may cry to take down my Christmas tree, and that’s ok. 

Our tree and decorations brought me joy this year. 

Things I’ve taken for granted had new meaning and beauty. 

I especially appreciated that my husband also expressed delight with it. 

It’s an old tree, although I’m not sure how many years we’ve had it.  For a time, it seemed like it stayed in the attic more years than we decorated it in our living room. 

Some years, I’ve thought it wasn’t full enough, didn’t have enough lights or the right decorations.

This year, everything was right, a good mix of old and new; spiritual and secular; cats and fishing; silly and serious. Truth is, except for a few new ornaments, the only thing that had changed was my perspective.

I was going to put the tree and trimmings away Sunday, Jan. 3, because that seemed be when I would have time to devote to the task before moving on to the next thing. The Christmas Spirit overruled that plan, so I will pack the tree and decorations away Jan. 5, the 12th day of Christmas. I’ll savor with gratitude the beauty and symbolism of the season, knowing I can carry that light and beauty in my heart throughout the year. 

Grateful for another new day

 Despite my year-end and new year posts on social media, I’m again aware as Jan. 1 winds down that my best approach to life is one day at a time. 

Anything other than that triggers expectations and anxieties that add nothing positive to my life. 

I tend to forget this and start trying to wrap days, weeks, seasons, years, decades and eras into neat packages.

It never works. I get distracted by the packaging and miss the gifts of living in the moments. 

After many years of trying to live one day at a time, exactly how to do it is still a bit elusive to me.

I just know that when I cried out to God in prayer today, to help me know where to even begin this year, this is the answer that eventually came. 

It brings peace. It brings hope. It brings a sense of freedom. 

So I end this day being grateful today was just another new day with blessings and opportunities. It is enough. It is good.