I'm still in what I hope is just a summer slump. I know the answer is just to get busy, put one foot in front of the other; take one step and then another. But something is blocking me.
I'm praying for willingness and faith to know and do what God would have me do, to His glory. But the results still seem nil.
My daily reading from the United Methodist Upper Room offered this suggestion: Make a list of five good things God has done in your life recently.
Why does even this seem hard? Everything God does in my life is good. He does so much. And I guess I take a lot of it for granted. Plus, right now, there's the issue of thinking He could do so much more in my life if I didn't get in His way.
Five good things ...
--He's given me encouraging words to share at church, in my family, at work and in other interactions. Yes, even in my "meantime," I think most of my negativity is focused inward so I can still see and express much that is good.
--He's given me faith not to give up even as I struggle.
--He's given me awareness that keeps me from overeating when I'm frustrated or in a slump. (That would only make things worse for me.)
--He's faithful every day. Great is God's faithfulness: morning by morning, day by day, new mercies I see.
--He continues to bless me with His love and the love of family and friends.
Sigh. That didn't work either! Or so it seems.
Words of encouragement I've received this weekend:
--God loves us just as we are. We don't have to earn His love. He knows our needs, our hurts, our dreams, our frustrations and our passions. He knows our hearts.
--"Whispering Hope." It's the song I'm working on for next weekend. The words provide comfort, guidance and, yes, hope. May I take them to heart.
And, yes, I am still avoiding the real issues. Maybe next time. Sigh.
OK, another powerful suggestion just came to mind, this one from today's anthem: "O sinners, let's go down, down to the river to pray." Before and after the anthem, I was thinking I needed to spend some time in prayer. Not at the river, but maybe the altar. And then I got caught up in talking with people after church and didn't take that time. But there's no reason I can spend some time on my knees now.