Friday, January 1, 2016

What a difference a year makes!! (Or: one day at a time will tell)

So, I started and am ending this Jan. 1 about as unfocused and goalless as I can ever remember being. And I just reread last year's Jan. 1 blog post, and it confirms my suspicion. 

Last year's goal was to live in the moment. And maybe that's what I am still doing. Maybe it only seems unfocused and goalless. Maybe I'm really being more spontaneous and faithful and trusting in God. 

I know this is another "cheating" post, at least for now. I'm starting it on Jan. 1 and saving it as a draft, so I'll have the day's time stamp if I do decide to post it. That's what I did yesterday, too. (I have not posted that one as of 10:30 p.m. Jan. 1.)

The good news is this dishonesty isn't as bad as the dishonesty I carried in my life a year ago. The frustrating part is that I still seem unable to just be honest, who I am, and not have to cling to these ideals of posting pithy observations on key dates on the calendar or whatever other expectation I have for myself. 

I had so hoped to be able to articulate some goals for the year. And I have nothing. For tonight, that feels like a step backward. I guess time will tell if it really is. One day at a time will tell. 

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