Tuesday I prayed for God to help me give back to Him the time I've been stealing regularly to watch soap operas. They seem like innocent attempts to relax or escape mentally, but for me they always result in second-guessing and regret. They do not help. They interfere, just like overeating does for me.
A week earlier I had written: Lord, please help me cut ties with the soap operas. They are time wasters I cannot afford in my day. But I just keep going back to them, hanging on, catching up, wasting time, being distracted. Even to let go one day would help, but I just don't see it happening. Lead me, Lord. I trust You and thank You.
Yes, it seems like one small thing, but it's big amid the stress. I can't afford to waste time watching TV. It adds to stress rather than relieves it.
Last week, I turned the soaps on anyway. And when I turn them on, I end up watching. But this week, I didn't turn on the TV Wednesday morning, and the goal is to not turn it on Thursday or Friday.
It will be Maundy Thursday and Good Friday of Holy Week. I won't be able to attend the worship observances commemorating significant final moments of Jesus' earthly life before His crucifixion. I'm praying for God to show me some other ways to experience this part of the Easter story, and I'm trusting that He will.
Here's a thought: Sometimes Maundy Thursday services include foot-washing services, re-enacting one of Jesus' teachings. Maybe if I can get the soaps out, it will be symbolic of that.
Lead me, Lord. I trust You and thank You.