Fine lines and fine-tuning

There's no law that says I have to get 8 hours of pillow time every night, but it's been a great goal during these weeks of transition to working until midnight most weekdays. It has had benefits, even though I've still seemed tired. But maybe it's time to let go. I was awakened at 8:30 a.m. Saturday by a wonderful call from my brother. I so enjoyed catching up with him. But what will I do about just 6 1/2 hours sleep, I wondered. The obvious answer seemed to be a nap later.

That's not how it turned out though. After errands and a meeting starting at noon, I ended up watching or listening to a lot of basketball on TV, online and on the radio. I was able to do some other things while following the games, but napping wasn't among those things. I shut off the radio after the last of the three teams I was following won about 10:30 p.m., which would not have seemed that bad, except I had agreed to sing at early church the next day, which meant the alarm was set for 6. That still shouldn't be too much of a problem, I thought. Eight hours is the goal. It's not a rigid requirement.

Again, so much for my thoughts. It was a restless night. It didn't seem like I slept at all, so at one point I seriously considered sending an e-mail to the person in charge of the music and saying I would call in the morning to confirm that I wouldn't be in for early church. That really seemed like the reasonable thing to do. It didn't seem like I'd gotten any rest at all, so I thought I would be miserable when the alarm finally went off. But somehow, I awoke feeling fairly rested and refreshed. I figured my energy would suddenly crash, but I made it through a full day without it happening. In the meantime, I heard a great sermon, sang wonderful hymns with the congregation and a wonderful anthem with the choir (the same song I did as a solo at early church), and experienced an invigorating Sunday school discussion and later a Bible study, along with lots of fellowship. I also did the Sunday usuals: buying groceries, washing some clothes, riding my exercise bike and a lot of reading, a little housecleaning and calling my Mom, among other things. And no nap.

So, now it's Monday of a busy week in which I'd like to fit in some extra activities. I haven't figured out this sleep/schedule thing. Because I have to be alert up until midnight for work and after that for the 30-minute drive home, it seems imperative to me to make sure I get enough sleep. I don't want to feel too tired to drive home. But rigidity is starting to feel unrealistic. But without rigidity, I get little done other than eat, sleep and work.

So, it seems as if I'm walking along a fine line of what works and what doesn't work. I'm tempted to think it needs fine-tuning. But at the same time, it seems like maybe it's working just fine.

I have no resolution to this right now, but for some reason I think writing about it will bring me closer to an answer.

Things I do know and cling to:
-- God is in charge. Great is God's faithfulness.
-- God knows what I need and is providing it.
-- Seek, trust and obey God.
-- Thank God.